Missing signals

missing-signals

When you wait for things to happen, they don’t.

Emily kept looking what time it was on her phone. She did not notice it at first. But in the back of her mind, she kept asking is it 11:11 yet? accompanied by her hand pushing any button of her phone to lighten its screen up and see what time it was.

It wasn’t.

But it soon would be–only if she would press that button right on time. For her, there is just one right time to look the time.

She had only noticed the night before that she was seeing this number a lot, lately.

It must mean something to her–she had heard this somewhere, so it had to be true.

This conviction grew inside her, making her proud of what she had figured out with the help of no one.

Emily, however, kept looking at her phone screen. Now, with more urgency than before, as she approached the time she had devoted all her hopes to.

And yet she started to think of something else.

She thought of having other signals.

Did she miss one she had never notice? Was somebody in her life meant to be a messenger just for her and when the mission was accomplished, that person flew away?

That means to die immediately.

She went on listing a few names of who this people might be and she wrote down up to thirty-six. Emily was not very sure if someone had died. In fact, she checked on her laptop everyone’s Facebook profile.

Alive.

That really meant nothing to her.

Everything that could mean something, had already been told. Shown.

Emily had only one signal left to hold on to: she pushed a button–any button, and she saw that it already was 12:21.

She hated herself for having missed her signal and hurried to get ready for the day, shouting out loud how stupid she was for having had lost that much time figuring out what?

It was already too late, she thought, when she stormed away.